Absolutely Fabulous

(The Movie) (Dir. Mandie Fletcher, 2016)

♥

We love Absolutely Fabulous,

The TV show with its shrill and frabjous

Carve-up of the naff world of fashion;

The celebrity swim-through, the sterile passion

Bubbling away in a Bollinger glass,

Emptied like life and sadly come to pass.

But as for the film, we rate it Poor,

Great moments, yes: Patsy walks into a door

And Edina sings her ‘road-walking’ song

But the laughs aren’t sustained for very long.

The walk-ons wholly fail to satisfy

And Patsy’s Bowie disguise refuses to fly.

We’re given a gloss on tired old themes

And the plot design is showing its seams.

At our screening the air was thick

With cackling so maybe we missed a trick

But though we be fans, here’s our entreaty:

Must do better next time, Sweetie!