(with apologies to William Wordsworth)
Tony Abbott! thou shouldst be with us at this hour:
Australia hath need of thee: she is a swamp
Of stagnant waters; dust, and rising damp,
Our wealth for toil and sea-girt bower
Have lost strength, their inner steel doth cower –
We now are selfish, addled, multi-gendered dopes:
Please raise us up, do restore our hopes;
Let us not scare easily with each passing shower.
Thy words could quite embarrass, yet ring clear;
But never weasel words, never insincere
Even if you were.
Learning on the job, too late you learned
Conquest’s Second Law; Thereby were you burned
By lowly chancers, sniffing at the breeze
Of a stupider Australia, blasé and at her ease.