“Refinement lies in the heart and the spirit rather than in outward appearance, but it is by what we do and say that we prove that it exists within us.” [Laura Troubridge, The Book of Etiquette.]
Since the publication of that book in 1926, have there been any paradigm shifts?
WEDDING MUSIC
1926: “The bride usually enters to the strains of Lohengrin, and goes down the aisle to those of Mendelssohn’s Wedding March.”
2016: The dominant partner will karaoke “Every Breath You Take.”
INTRODUCTIONS
1926: “Care should be taken when making an introduction to pronounce the two names clearly.”
2016: ‘No need. Who cares, mate? If strangers haven’t met online already, there’s always Google.’
INVITATIONS
1926: “…almost invariably sent out on an engraved card.”
2016: Intercepted via FaceBook or over the police radio.
CORRESPONDENCE
1926: “Never put on paper what you would not care to see printed in a newspaper for all to read.”
2016: Sample SMS/Tweet/Post: “You’re a ****in ****sucking loser nobody cares whetha u live or die Get ovah it or you’ll be chained to a lamppost for dogs to **** on.”
DINNER
1926: “Dinner invitations must be answered at once. It is most inconsiderate to leave a hostess in uncertainty and unable to complete her party.”
2016: Common SMS: “c u later if can make it mate.”
HOTELS
1926: “It is as important to remember one’s social obligations in an hotel as it is in the house of a friend.”
2016: ‘It is important to remember the mini-bar, the lubricant, and whether the TV fits through the window.’
COURTESY IN OMNIBUS AND TUBE
1926: “When the seat is given, the owner should be thanked for his kindness.”
2016: ‘Avoid vomiting on seats with fabric covers.’
BEFORE THE PLAY
1926: “Low tones are a mark of cultivation.”
2016: ‘Always try to avoid spitting, urinating, singing, snoring, smoking, fighting, or bursting chip packets in the last third of the movie.’
MOTORING ETIQUETTE
1926: “Considerate motorists, in passing through villages in hot weather, will slow down in order to raise as little dust as possible.”
2016: ‘Never more than 10 donuts outside the same house – never more than one bottle hurled at the same sign.’
KIDS ON A TRIP
1926: “…children…should be checked…if they speak too loudly or behave in such a way as to be tiresome to fellow-passengers.”
2016: ‘What’s your problem pal? She’s only singing Old MacDonald Had a Farm…’ “E-I, E-I, O!”
LEAVING A TIP
1926: “Tips should be given in accordance with one’s own means…”
2016: ‘Never pat a burning dog.’
DRESS
1926: “Speaking generally, it is in bad taste to dress extravagantly or showily when walking or mingling with people who are all plainly dressed.”
2016: ‘Pick the skankiest person at the Brownlow Medal dinner or the MTV Awards and adapt their costume, using bolts from Spotlight.’
CONDUCT WHICH IS INCORRECT
1926: “To question people about their private affairs.”
2016: ‘To ask people about their opinions.’
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