Author Archive: Lesley Jakobsen
Heretic
"The wife is shy, but the pie is nigh!"
(Directed by Scott Beck and Bryan Wood, 2024) We who do not live in horror-film-land know that no young woman should ever go into the isolated, charming house at the bottom of a wind-strewn garden during a rainstorm. Unfortunately for them, LDS missionaries Sister Paxton (Chloe East) and Sister Barnes (Sophie Thatcher) do live in that land and did not get the memo. In non-horror-film-land the missionaries would be young men but of course, women are the proper victims of imprisonment, slashings and creepy things in horror-film-land so there it is. Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant) lives in that house and…
Continue Reading →Longlegs (2024)
Note: this is the film's edit, not TVC's.
(Director: Osgood Perkins, who is also the sole accredited writer. You have been warned). Long Legs is so terrible that we advise against seeing it (if you value your time, money and/or pride). SPOILER ALERT In case there are any readers who might be considering seeing it, we will help dissuade you by posting some spoilers. And, perhaps some of you who have watched this rubbish could help us out with some of our queries. It starts off well enough – don’t all horror films? Perkins has just enough talent to do one good scene. Small girl, curiously alone…
Continue Reading →Barbarian (2022)
(Director – not to be mentioned. He is not to be encouraged.) [Zach Cregger directed, his first, possibly last, effort, although the film made good money apparently – Facts matter- ED.] “Barbarian” is not rateable on the “Babadook Scale“. It’s not that sort of horror movie. It’s the sort on which even fewer pesky script meetings are wasted. You can determine whether you have seen this film by casting yourself in the lead role and answering the following questions. You are a young woman who arrives in the rainy dead of night to find that your B & B is…
Continue Reading →Eurovision 2024
Malmö in Sweden got to host dear old sparkly Eurovison after Loreena’s win in 2023. Loreena was welded into a silver cocktail glass at the end of the evening and pushed onto the stage under a fringe of shredded shower curtains where she writhed and sang a rather wan version of her 2023 winning entry. Her stringy beige bodysuit shrank in the wash so her stylists had glued some robotic bits onto it. Very Eurovision. Looks 5/5, song 1/5. Our hosts this year were normal size, not angry and only two in number. It looks like Graeme Norton said, “I’m…
Continue Reading →Quilts: The Fabric of War
(1760-1900) Exhibition at the Roche Museum, 22 February, 2024 / Book and collection by Annette Gero This exhibition of applique and geometric masterpieces, all made from military fabrics, was simply stunning. Dr. Annette Gero, an acknowledged expert on quilt history, has collected these sumptuous pieces, featuring complex, intricate patterns, to mythical and historical narratives. Her book based on this collection is published by The Beagle Press and available through the David Roche Foundation House Museum, Adelaide. We saw a dazzling array of styles and subject-matter. The main image is an English Intarsia Quilt, c. 1870, by Michael Zumpf, a Hungarian,…
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